The Story of a Pantsless Girl

Many moons ago, when I was about yea old..

(Yes, I am still that good looking.)

I was standing in the backyard.. patiently watching my mother do her business. I mean, she wasn't peeing or anything, but we had horses and she was giving them a good workout.

And I was standing there watching her. This was obviously before I had a laptop, cell phone, or television. Since then I have come to my senses and I stay inside.

I'm getting off track.

I was standing there, watching my mom work her horse, when I felt something tickling my leg. I had on sneakers and pants. I froze. Eyes popped. The tickling continued in an upward motion. There was obviously only one thing causing the tickles.

BUG.

So I did what any rational person would do. I kicked my shoes off and took my pants off, right there in the middle of the yard. Yes we have neighbors who can see.. and who were outside. But more importantly, YES THERE WAS A BUG ON MY LEG. A stink bug. We can all collectively agree that I made the right decision.

After my mom found out why I was stripping and prancing around half naked in the back yard, I ran inside and promptly took a shower, scratching my leg raw to remove any bug tracks. I might be exaggerating on the last part. I might not be. 

My friends, I just told you a great story of my life and wasted five minutes of yours. You're welcome.