Filling You In

Things have been SO hectic. But somehow I still find time to blog... yeah.

Thursday, my mom and I picked up my aunt from the Vegas airport. While we were doing that, my dad was getting my brother from LAX. It was relieving to get to see family again.
Friday was absolutely insane. My mom and I had to drive to Vegas again to get my brother. We thought he was at Nellis AFB. Turns out, he was at a base 5 hours away from us. So we turned around and went home, my mom went down to the viewing.. and my brother and I turned right back around to go pick up my brother. 9 hour drive. 2 hours into the drive my mom called and told us to turn around.. they bought him a plane ticket. COOL. Whatever. It was quality time with my brother, and I got some cool pictures.


So now.. I'm home from the services. I got all dolled up just to be sad.

And no, I didn't try to look sad on purpose. I forgot to smile.

We watched his coffin being put in the mausoleum, then attended the memorial service. I think I strained a neck muscle trying not to cry. The entire time. It's hard. It hurts. Even if I know he's in a better place.. I hate that he's not here anymore. I have so many memories of him. It's hard.

Ok. Phew.

I made a new friend who told me her name is Poop. She insists she's 30, and I'm no older than 13. Don't tell her she's 6 and I'm really 20. And in the 20th grade. She's in the 30th. (Wouldn't that be terrible? 30th grade?) She also gave me a flower. And tried to stick a ball of glue onto my forehead. And she tried to bite my nose off. It's cool though, I tried to bite hers off first. That was the bright spot of my day. Along with being with my family.

After everything, we visited the graves of other family member's there. None I knew. My dad's brother, who died at 5 years old. His grandma and grandpa. Cemeteries make me feel peaceful and lonely at the same time. It's a terrible, haunting feeling. One that you feel deep in your chest. Does that make sense? It's just how I felt being there.

In all.. it's over. Things can go back to normal now. As normal as my life gets. My birthday is Wednesday and I don't really care. I start work again on Monday. What a way to spend my spring break right?

Big sigh. Big gulps.


Hope Chella said...

Funerals and wakes are really strange and sad. I'm sorry you have to work all spring break too :( Life is life. But this will be your 21st right? That's kind of exciting??

Alyssa said...

Funerals and wakes are always tough and its sad its generally the only time family makes a real effort to get together.

On the plus side you got time with your brother :)

Hope this week is a little bit snazzy- you deserve it, its your birthday!! xx

Kirsty said...

I'm so sorry - I just caught up on all of this. I hope you're feeling better now that the funeral is done, and you can move on and look to the future. Think of all the happy memories! And feel better soon x

Sarah said...

Very sorry about your grandfather. Remember the good times that you had with him. My grandfather passed away 3 years ago, and I still think of him all the time...not in a sad way anymore, though.

Anonymous said...

He is now in heaven looking after you, no doubt about it.

Leah said...

The good thing about this is you were able to spend quality time with your family... your grandpa wants that. He's smiling in heaven now.

And Poop is so cute. Glad you made a new friend.

Have a great week ahead Kellie... it's your birthday week so enjoy! xoxo

Ang said...

Girl, it's okay to cry! Seriously... especially when it is a member of your family! Hope it get easier for you; chin up!

Taylor-Made Wife said...

I'm so sorry for your loss. Honestly though, you are such a beautiful woman(in a non-gay way). I really like that picture of you.

OceanDreams said...

Sorry about your loss Kellie. Glad you were able to spend some time with your family and brother.